Anxiety & Sleep

Sleep and Anxiety. They don’t seem to have the best relationship, especially for me. Anxiety makes my mind race, making everything feel tight, constricting, and uncomfortable. Sleeping is often impossible for me and even when I fall asleep, I wake up early with an overwhelming feeling of dread. Because I’m so bad at sleeping, I get lots of anxiety about not getting enough sleep. Then my anxiety and depression flares up when I’m overtired. It’s a vicious cycle.

Holding it together through the day to day, whilst experiencing nearly constant anxiety, can be extremely tiring. Sometimes just going through the motions is exhausting to the core. It is hard to explain this to someone who has never experienced this kind of anxiety. A few of my good friends and my parents have said that they do not fully understand how I feel, but they try their best to support me.

I’ve always needed more sleep than the average bear – literally! Most people my age, that I know, sleep an average of 6-7 hours of sleep a night. In order to give my body a fighting chance to feel its best, I need at least 8 hours of sleep. 9 hours is optimal. I am almost 35 years old and I’m still hoping to grow out of this need to get so much rest. It’s so difficult in our busy world.

Lack of sleep can cause irritability, irrational thoughts, and mild depression. I am also fuzzy and lightheaded when I have not had enough sleep. I used to drink a lot of coffee back in the day to combat my sleeplessness. However, now I understand that I was ultimately making it harder to sleep by pumping my body full of caffeine. It took awhile to break the caffeine dependency, but now that I have, just a little bit of coffee makes me jump out of my skin!

One of my friends asked me what I do to wake up in the morning without coffee or tea. I shrugged and told her I just woke up. To help my anxiety, I try my best to keep a calm baseline. I do miss the morning buzz, but not taking medication to assist my mental health is important to me, and this is one of the sacrifices I’ve had to make.

 

This Post Is A Long Time Coming…

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I have made so many excuses not to write a blog, because I didn’t know how to start one. Well, the truth is that I still don’t, so, I’m just going to write. Unlike others who have popular blogs, I don’t have children (yet), I don’t travel all over the world, interior decorating is not my forte, and I am not a particularly good cook.

For me, my passions include yoga, lots of sleep, random acts of kindness, and looking at far too many memes to be healthy. There is literally nothing I enjoy more than curling up in bed with a good book or a few reruns of “Friends” on my laptop.

I am notorious for making elaborate plans when I’m in a good mood, and then find I’d rather crawl in a hole than go out on when the day actually comes. Canceled plans secretly thrill me and my bedtime is as close to 10pm as possible, sometimes earlier if I’m lucky. This girl loves her sleep.

Honestly, I haven’t the foggiest idea how to start a personal blog, so I’ll just begin mine with basic transparency. We’ll try to get some of the mundane details out of the way.

I’m in my early thirties, and the only child / adopted daughter of two very wonderful parents. I was born and raised in New England, but have been living in Southwest Florida for the past 4+ years and am happy to call this tropical (admittedly kind of sweaty) paradise home.

My hardworking, charismatic father’s relationship with my overbearing, big-hearted mother is #goals, as they say these days. Ha! (I’m not THAT old!) They are good relationship role models, and I am a very lucky girl, trials and tribulations aside.

I am not married yet, and am in no particular rush. However, admittedly, I’ve got a little bit of the baby fever. This is most likely a biological desire. Everyone and their mother (pun intended) is having babies right now at this phase in my life.

Been meaning to start a blog for an extraordinarily long amount of time, but always made excuses. I figured, who would want to read what I have to say? And do I really want anyone to read my ramblings?

Like I said, I don’t have cute babies to blog about, I’m not model, a gourmet chef, or master crafter. My passions include a semi-respectable yoga practice, listening to music, going to the beach, and sleeping.

So, here we are…

I feel like with blogging, I walk a fine line between being vulnerable and over-sharing. This is not a line I straddle confidently, but I guess that’s part of the challenge.

With reluctance and without further a-do, I begin this blog.

I guess we can only see where it goes…

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